buttpatrol: house-of-horrors: OMGFGFG never 4get omgg
keefvanhorn: r u turned on
Doctor: Are you sexually active?
Me: Laughs hysterically, makes pterodactyl noise, transforms into a potato and rolls out the door and away into the sunset
Me: Why do you like your girlfriend?
Friend: I don't know
Me: HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW?
Friend: Because I like everything about her
ididcokewithkatemoss: ¿¿¿¿¿¿¿did you know that it was actually me who was supposed to star in that Versace ad and not Sean O’pry??????? LOOOOOOOOOOL wtf marvin HHHAAHAH
nosdrinker: Does anybody even have insurance from The General their commercials look like they were made on a calculator